I have never had a pleasant New Year's Eve. EVER. It is now at the point where I resent even being made to stay up until midnight. Some people think that Christmas is the loneliest time of the year, but that thirty seconds, as you count down to New Year, where without fail I have witnessed everyone else hugging their close ones near as the chimes of Auld Lang's Syne kick in, is the lowest point of mine. Being third in line for a Happy New Year Hug is about as pleasant as being the last one picked in a P.E. class.
Apart from the fact that most New Year's celebrations are a massive anti-climax, a time of forced fun and fixed smiles, it's also bonkers how you're convinced it's an excellent idea to pay four times what you normally would do to eat a meal, or go out to a club - and more than that, a club you could go to the day before for the same price, DJ and cheaper drinks.
I thought I would share with you today, my top 3 most terrible New Year's Eve celebrations:
1. Last year, content with a bottle of wine, nice meal and a film in my flat I had planned to go to bed early, sleep for a long time and wake up to read a book in bed and laze around. Instead, I was ambushed by my parents, who meaning well, phoned, said they'd be around in half an hour to collect me and that I would be staying with them for New Years. I warned them I was heading to bed early. They had other plans. Every time I went to go to bed, they fed me, served another cup of tea or needed my opinion on something. So I caved in, watched the fireworks on the TV. Gave them a hug and slumped off to bed, in my brother's room, in a single bed, feeling more of a loser than normal.
2. When I was 19, my friends returned from our first year at university and we enjoyed catching up. Just after Christmas I got an eye infection - yup, the kind where you have to wear an EYE-PATCH. Needless to say I felt rotten. Were my friends bothered? Um, no. My best friend worked on me for ages and relenting I did what any girl who was forced to go to a party as an unintentional pirate, I decorated a patch with sequins to match my outfit and sucked it up. We were in the club for 30 minutes before two of my drunk friends got thrown out for play fighting, my best friend had already picked someone up and 'disappeared', and I had been approached by lots of people wanting to know if I had two eyes or not. Hideous. So we left before midnight and I ended up driving my friends home as the only person who hadn't drunk a single drop of alcohol due to anti-biotics. I spent midnight in a car, driving back to my parents having spent longer getting ready than celebrating.
3. I was in Canada visiting a friend ( the year after number 2) and we went out to a club. Due to the snow and the public transport system, the clubs stayed open until 7am in order that people could dance the night away or until the first train started again. The night started in a promising way. We got in, found rooms which didn't insist on playing ANY house music and started to have fun. The club, however, was massive. Within an hour or so we had lost each other. I must have spent 2 hours wandering around, doing the fake dance walk to avoid looking lost, searching for the people I was with. I didn't find them, so I settled in an armchair in a central area and decided to stay put until someone found me. Well, they did, at 2am, fast asleep. I'd slept through midnight. The only upside I suppose was that no-one had drawn on me in my slumber. Canadians are civilised like that!
Now the issue I have this year is quite massive. Unlike me, Andi has had lots of amazing New Years; he loves it. I have NO desire to go out, but want our first New Years to be as memorable, for the right reasons, as the rest of his. This is where you can help.
I am at a loss! What can I do this year for New Years which will be special but not involve arranging parties, leaving my flat or socialising? The challenge is on, my friends. What can I do?